Thursday, 26 January 2017
*Warning emotive content*
So this is something that I do not feel gets enough attention on the all important equality debate. I agree everyone should be equal in every aspect of life, what is good for one is good for everyone, no matter sex race religion or sexual orientation!
So here I am setting myself up for some hate along the way, however this is just my personal opinion!
The subject of parental equality first really hit home just shortly after having my first son. Me and my husband were not married at the tome of our eldest birth. This means that automatically my son was given my maiden name. When I asked the midwife why this happened, well her answer shocked me. Basically because I gave birth to him then he is my baby, my husband had little parental responsibility because we were not married! I was shocked how many rights a woman had straight away! I mean my initial thought was this baby would not of been born if it wasn't for both of us creating this life.
Then when we went to go and register our son for his birth certificate, the woman at the office started writing my maiden name as my son's surname. She had forgotten to ask if it would be different. Also I was extremely ill at the time we had to register him, I asked if his dad could just do it without me. They said simply No, I had to be present in order to register, however my husband did now! So basically I had every right to my son and he had none. As a woman you can go and register a child and not put a father down just because you want to.
I was fully parentally responsible for my son by law and my husband wasn't. It shocked me because not everyone wants to marry their partners.
Even in courts the mother has more rights for custody of the children then the fathers.
However my question is who says this is right? Yes there are dead beat dads out there who just do not care for their children. However there are some mums out there who do not care either. So in a world that is screaming for equality then where is there equality when is comes down to the next generations?
So agree with me or not, that is your choice. I just feel like this is a system that has flaws. There are dads out there screaming to see their children or have more parental rights, and there are also women out there who maybe just cant cope with all the responsibility.
Yes there are dads out there who deserve not to see their child for that child safety.
Yes there are women out there who exploit the fact they can use the automatic parental responsibilities to her own advantage!
But where is the common ground where is it equal, there are children being brought in to potentially volatile situations!