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Monday, 16 January 2017

Parenting goals for when you have young children

Parenting Goals

This year i want to acheive certain things as a parent, these things are goals that are important to us parent as I am sure most of them are applicable to most parents.

1. Have a cup of tea and drink it whilst hot.
    I have been a parent now for 4 years. And I think I can count on both hands how many nice warm/hot cups of tea I have drank whilst I am looking after my children. Yes I no the dangers of hot fluids trust me I burnt myself as a child.  But you no that optimum temperature 8that makes a cup of tea so pleasurable I crave it. But by the time it has cooled to this temperature my 4 year old is throwing Dino chargers everywhere being a power ranger and my 1 year old is filling his nappy. Therefore before you no it my tea I colder then the milk from the fridge!

2. Eat all of my dinner to myself without toddler slime all of it
    Even if we have the exact same food on our plates the children always want some of ours....its like they think I'm disguising it as a carrot but really it chocolate, this then leads to some sort of toddler slime on your plate! It becomes even worse if they have a cold, they always have the timing to sneeze right over your plate (sorry if you are eating). No matter how much you try and tell them you have the same they do not believe you, so you proceed to eat there food to show them they are the same and before you no it they have swapped plates with you, only to give you the slimy bits back.

3. Go to the loo without the kids or cat watching
    This is probably something that no matter how hard you try to sneak out the room they will always follow. Its like they have a secret sensor that is on the bathroom door and alarm bells go off like 'how dare you enter the bathroom without me'. If having two small humans that are basin height is not off putting in itself then you have the cat who thinks your toes are chew toys, or decide to sleep in you trousers round your ankles! This is one thing that you actually cannot wait for them to be older for when be in too small of a confined space with you just isn't 'cool' anymore.

4. Do my hair (not a ponytail) and make up for a school run.
I have always envied the mum who looks amazing at half 8 in the morning,even more so when she is on a school run. Im happy if i brush my teeth and quickly put my hair in a ponytail. So this year it is a goal to look presentable especially as my son goes to big school in september. After all it is only halloween once a year so it isn't like i have an excuse for this hot mess the other 364 days.

5. Go on the school run without snot or drool all over my top.
Well it is winter here in the uk right now, that means both of my sons noses stream faster then niagra falls. My 4 year old finally has the hang of snot in tissue, well after he attempts to use his sleeves as tissue. My 1 year old however seems to get a runny nose right at the moment his face is near my clothing. This resulting in me looking like i am a motorway for slugs amazing!
6. Remember the things i went in to a room for.
*Sigh* this one im trying to write off on the kids and here are my reason, i think its sleep deprevation 4 years of late nights and early morning none stop will take it out of your brain, the fact that when i go to get something one of the kids want something , done in a certain way, on a certain plate or cup. Or maybe im just losing my marbles before im 30!
7. Not watch the same cartoons again and again (or film for that matter).
If i watch the same episodes of Power Rangers, Peppa Pig, Ninjago or even Despicable Me or Cat in the Hat i may scream. And i mean scream as in shatter glass, make ears bleed. It is like daily torture. Yet my little darlings just seem to enjoy watching the same episode everytime. Its bad when not only your child but even you can recite the whole entire season!

8. Not be used as a climbing frame.
So we as parents get our children toys and, board games and, basically anything we feel will entertain our children for hours. When really all we need is a cardboard box and ourselfs, because my kids seem to have THE best time climbing all over me and sliding down my legs like im a climbing frame! 
9.Dont watch kids cartoons when they have gone to bed 
So you complain of watching childrens cartoons or the same blasted film all the time. However what the children don't know is, that when they have gone to bed, you sit for an hour or so still watching Peppa bratty Pig, before you realise your allowed to watch more advance tv, by this i mean people sing to judges, or dance for judges, or anything to do with judges basically.

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